The Uterus Troll

I may have to retire from movie making; this one is so good, I’m not sure I can ever top it. There’s singing. There’s the promotion of drug use and promiscuity. There’s puppets and the truth about menstrual cramps. It’s not safe for work and not safe for children.

But it is vagina friendly, which I guess means it will never win an Oscar.

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23 thoughts on “The Uterus Troll

  1. *snickers uncontrollably*Now you’ve gone and made me late for my meeting! *is still laughing*My uterus troll was totally abusing his forking privileges yesterday. I don’t even have a lining for him to discard!I can see that this thought has been of major concern to the blogosphere these past days. *nods*

  2. This was too funny. You are a silly girl, Aunt B. But, I love it! My own uterus troll has been wreaking havoc on my uterus this week. Can’t wait till he’s flushed out (till the nex time! ugh!!!)….. On that note,I’m gonna go and *relieve* me some tension, and help chase that troll right out of my cooter!

  3. A) By the end of the movie I thought Lamby might also need a little song about her eye. It looked loose. ;-pB) My uterus troll stays with me all the time and uses a chain saw. In fact, my uterus troll is so evil that he has decided to take up rent in other parts of my body. c) I love this movie. I will be singing the song all week.

  4. Squirrel Queen and I just watched your fine Shari Lewis rendering of the Uterus Troll.So Fucking excellent that I cannot even quit smiling.Awesome, B., awesome.Glad mine’s gone.

  5. One wordWhoopeee!Where was this informative footage 28 years ago when I needed it?I think if we can get this shown in a theater the Academy can’t deny you a nomination.Aunt B on the Red Carpet. Of course, you’d leave that little Lamby in your wake once you hit the big time.Was this inspired by your educational foray into the world of Schoolhouse Rock? Three beers is the magic number.

  6. My uterus troll generally uses the wringer from an old wringer washer. But that is one of the funniest movies I have ever seen.

  7. I have decided that I have no uterus troll, but rather an army of marauding, uterine Uruk-hai.They’re ugly, come and go at whim, and use a lot of wicked-looking weapons. (And, okay, are kind of irrelevant and can be defeated by the nearest hot guy with the *ahem* appropriate equipment. We are not speculating on the role of halflings in this particular war.)

  8. If the Academy doesn’t get to see this masterpiece then the ‘academy’ is missing what should easily be the winner in a category I have yet to figure out exactly.Nonetheless, an Oscar is due, just so we can hear the acceptance speech and the thank you’s…oh lord, this is funny. uh, am is supposed to be here?

  9. Poor Lamby is already down to one eye and her nose is hanging on pretty precariously. If her eyes fall off, I may get her some buttons for eyes. Something I can sew on instead of glue.I wonder where my dad got those puppets. I’d love to have the pattern. I could whip up all kinds of them.Newscoma, it’d be awesome if we got drunk and sang that song while you were here. And yes, Squirrel Queen, I think I was inspired by Schoolhouse Rocks.John, I’m glad you liked it. Of course you can participate in this discussion. You’ve been invited into a vagina. That’s all the street cred you need here.

  10. I’m so glad that you cleared the dice pictures off your camera to make room for this!This belongs in every middle school health class.

  11. Ahhh. This explains much to me. In Clerks 2 I learned about the vagina troll. I think he’s just a misunderstood uterus troll.

  12. There’s a vagina troll in Clerks 2?! Now I’m going to have to break down and watch that movie.

  13. Careful. It’s just about as unfriendly as the uterus troll. It’s a troll that keeps you from having sex.

  14. She made me watch. Dear lord, my eyes! They bleed! Ze goggles! Zeh do nosink!Sorry, I’m too busy laughing over the phone to write anything meaningful.

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  16. I’m sad that I’m just seeing this now. A friend sent me the link last week when my uterus troll was forking around and making miserable.

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