Let Us Cross All Our Fingers

Okay, y’all, I have made some slight alterations to “Honey, I’m So Lonesome I Don’t Know What to Do” and sent it off to this here contest.
Why, yes, I do feel like throwing up a little bit.
But it’s cool.
I hope they like it.

Why It’s Hard to Talk on the Phone in My Bedroom

Look at her whiskers!  My favorite thing is to pet those whiskers right under her nose.  They’re all bristley like a walrus and if she’s not in the mood to have them pet, which she’s normally not, you get licked.
But if you’re on the phone and it sounds like you’re having a good time, giggling [...]

My Internet Crush of the Week

Y’all, I cannot resist a person with swagger.  I just can’t.  And to watch Liz Garrigan walking all over the internet like she’s packing ten thick inches about does me in.
Please don’t think less of me, Brittney.
And, shoot, Liz, I probably wouldn’t last an hour under your “quality control,” but I’m willing to try.

In Other News

It is a sweaty armpit of a day out there.  Yuck.
But on my way to lunch, I realized something.
And here it is.
I come from a long line of unacknowledged assholes.  Even the folks who I’ve been convinced were the best folks on the planet, were, with the exception of my Grandpa Bob, kind of jerks.
Many [...]

Brief Programming Note

Though it’s not entirely clear what’s going on with my “horse,” I appear to have a new “horse.”  In many ways it resembles the old “horse” except that I’ve been given interesting and fun things to do with my “horse” today, which is very cool.
So, I guess I have switched “horses.”
But, knowing this place, maybe [...]

Ruining Rap for Young People

Nothing tickles me more than driving around with Mrs. Wigglebottom, rap music blaring.  We roll up to a stop sign and the first thing the young people here is our thudding bass and then they see the bad-ass pit bull and then they see the fat old white woman in the driver’s seat, singing along.
Ha, [...]

A Very Brief Quiz

Explain the difference between this:
Any person who—knowing or in reckless disregard of the fact that an alien has come to, entered, or remains in the United States in violation of law, conceals, harbors, or shields from detection, or attempts to conceal, harbor, or shield from detection, such alien in any place, including any building or [...]