One Long and Lonely Bridge

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I explained it to Imfunnytoo like this the other night and I found it to actually be a metaphor that stuck with me, just because it makes sense of my predicament for me in a way that makes it seem possibly manageable.

This is what it’s like. I used to be on firm ground. I will end up on firm ground. But to get from firm ground to firm ground, I’m faced with the scariest bridge I can imagine.

Sure, it’s not going to drop me. Sure people use it every day and live. And I’ve got no choice anyway.

But I’m terrified, still.

Tuesday, 9:30, I meed the surgeon.

It’s the Butcher’s birthday. He gets to come with me because I want him to understand what’s going to happen so that he can make wise decisions when I have to give him power of attorney over me.

He’s already threatening to sell my car and empty my bank account.

Joke’s on him. My bank account’s already empty!

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7 thoughts on “One Long and Lonely Bridge

  1. Hey, if anyone knows about walking on those metaphorical crazy high bridges, it’s Imfunnytoo. You can walk in the dark with her because she doesn’t scare worth a damn.

  2. B.
    Thinking of you, my dear. I think of you a lot actually. All of this stuff is scary and terrifying and just surreal, all this health and the betrayal of our bodies.
    But, with that said, I am learning that the bridge, the journey of walking across isn’t so bad. It’s fucked up, but apparently we are supposed to do it for some reason.

    Just wanted to know I’m thinking about you, lighting a candle that smells of sage and wood that comforts me and reminds me of you. I like this candle better than anyone in the house.
    Kisses to you, my friend.

  3. Newscoma, you and I are kind of like two people lost in the same woods, each on a slightly different trail, but keeping in sight of each other, aren’t we?

  4. My experience is that after you’ve taken a few steps you realize that you can do it. The bridge doesn’t get wider or more solid, or even any shorter, but you gain confidence in the walking of it.

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