The Tiny Cat is So Weird

She’s sitting in there right now eating the dog food.  There’s an enormous bag of cat food not two feet away, and a bowl of cat food up on the table, but the dog food is where her heart is.  And her mouth, apparently.

If I Were the Professor…

I’d come over here in a HASMAT suit and kick my ass.  Folks.  I am sick.  I’m running a fever I can get to subside, but I can’t get to break.  Dayquil just makes me sick to my stomach and Nyquil stuffed me up so bad I had to get up and walk around just [...]

In Which I Speak Ill of the Dead

So, David Foster Wallace is dead.
Fuck him.
Philosophically, I believe you have the right to do with your body whatever you like, including killing yourself, if that’s what it comes to.  But, emotionally, when you read that he hung himself and left himself for his wife to find?
Fuck him.
As much as you first and foremost belong [...]