The Tiny Cat Has Lost Her Damn Fool Mind

Posted on July 2, 2009 by Aunt B.

So, the tiny cat has taken to hanging out on the toilet seat when she’s in the house.  Fair enough.  And as you remember, she taught herself to pee in the toilet, also fair enough.

Well, I go in there this morning and there’s liquid on the floor and liquid on the seat and I’m all “God damn it, if you’re going to use the toilet, use the motherfucking toilet.”

But American (and folks in Australia), I just came back from the bathroom and…

SHE WAS SITTING IN THE TOILET.

Like, oh, I don’t know, it’s her own person bathtub.  And when I’m all like, “I have to go pee,” well, she’s shooting me the very same look you’d shoot someone if you were taking a bath and I came in and said, “Hey, get out of there a second so I can pee.”

And, of course, when she got out of the toilet, her whole bottom half was wet.  Which then spewed water everywhere.

So, anyway, the end result of all of this is that, though it will upset the environmentalists, I am instituting a “flush every time” policy, because some of us, occassionally, are allowed to pet the toilet cat.

Filed under: The Cats

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15 Responses

  1. dolphin, on July 2nd, 2009 at 7:42 am Said:

    Can’t you just put the seat-lid down?

  2. Rustmeister, on July 2nd, 2009 at 8:22 am Said:

    Maybe she was trying to use the toilet and fell in. Once you caught her, she just played it off like she was supposed to be there.

    I’m only half joking. I had a cat that would pee in the toilet. He never fell in, though.

  3. W, on July 2nd, 2009 at 8:50 am Said:

    So you guys didn’t have a flush every time rule before today?

  4. Southern Beale, on July 2nd, 2009 at 9:40 am Said:

    I wonder if she is showing solidarity for the puppy accidentally flushed down the toilet last week?

  5. Rachel, on July 2nd, 2009 at 10:53 am Said:

    Maybe she’s trying to tell you she needs a bath? We’ve had a seat lid down rule around here ever since the time one of the cats drank out of the toilet and promptly vomited all over the place.

  6. Aunt B., on July 2nd, 2009 at 11:28 am Said:

    W., I didn’t. But this medication I’m on makes me pee a lot after I take it, and if I’m going to have an hour of peeing every ten minutes every evening, I don’t see the necessity of flushing all that time.

    Dolphin, well, sure, but ruin her fun?

  7. moa72, on July 2nd, 2009 at 11:43 am Said:

    OMG! This made me laugh so hard! I’m sitting by myself eating lunch, so imagine how silly I must have looked!

  8. Stick, on July 2nd, 2009 at 1:45 pm Said:

    you made me snort water out my nose!

  9. Level Best, on July 2nd, 2009 at 1:52 pm Said:

    Cats have explorers’ hearts but no compass.

  10. Rachel, on July 2nd, 2009 at 3:21 pm Said:

    W, if it’s yellow…

  11. dancingmorganmouse, on July 3rd, 2009 at 3:54 am Said:

    This “folk” from Australia would LOVE her cat to pee in the toilet!

  12. heather, on July 3rd, 2009 at 8:13 am Said:

    Obviously you need to leave the toilet for the cat and use a commode for yourself. Then dilute the pee 7-10 to 1(depends on how hydrated you are) and use it in your garden-it’s a very good source of nitrogen.

    Then the viney things may grow even more vigorously and take over the house…..

  13. Leigh, on July 3rd, 2009 at 2:35 pm Said:

    “Cats have explorers’ hearts but no compass.”
    OMG, best line evah! As a proud cat owner(slave), I heart!
    Also, many times my macho dudecat Jack falls off the TV cleaning himself and then looks at me like I PUSHED him off from way across the room…

  14. W, on July 3rd, 2009 at 5:01 pm Said:

    Just kidding you B. I had that policy too until the day the twins figured out the lid came up on the toilets. Now we flush every time and keep the tp in high places.

  15. Megan, on July 15th, 2009 at 1:27 pm Said:

    I think your tiny cat and my tiny cat (Link) need to meet. :)

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