A Poem for David Boaz

No, I’m still not done with that fucking Libertarianism: A Primer. I’m sorry. It’s just slow going and parts of it are really boring. But today, finally, even though he blamed the War on Drugs on the Clintons*, he made a spectacular point about the intellectuals’ love of planning and devising programs.

In honor of Boaz’s brilliant point, I have composed this sonnet**.

“The Moral Equivalency of War” (or “America Works Best When All Americans are Working towards the Same Goals”)

“Let us meet about the meeting we’ll have
to set a time for us to meet again.”
“A regiment does you well. Feel my calf.
A war on fat is the way to go. Pain

reminds us we’re alive and sacrifice
is good for the soul. Let’s create a task-
force to look into a diet of rice.
We’ll promote it on TV. If we ask

For the time. They’ll give us advertising
space because we know what’s good for us all.”
You can almost hear their joy in rising
to the challenge of being on the ball.

It must be nice to be so sure that you
know better what’s best for me than I do.

Hmm. That doesn’t suck half as bad as it might have. Anyway, for my own reasons, I’m digging on the libertarians propensity to knock the wind out of the sails of well-meaning planners and program-implementers. So, thanks for that, mostly-wrong-headed right-wing gun-nuts.

*Because, lord knows the right wing cannot miss an opportunity for Clinton bashing. I would not be surprised to find that hearing or reading the word “Clinton” triggered for them the same feeling that a good nipple pinch does for the rest of us. You don’t want it to happen out of the blue, but under the right circumstances, it is a lovely decadent ouch.
**Actually, I have not yet composed the sonnet. I’m concerned I won’t actually be able to write a whole sonnet devoted to libertarianism, but now I have a goal. If it goes poorly, I’ll just go back and change the word “sonnet” to “poem” and you will never be the wiser. Anyway, on with the composition…

18 thoughts on “A Poem for David Boaz

  1. It must be nice to be so sure that you know better what’s best for me than I do.

    I think you’ve missed a basic tenet of Libertarianism

  2. Boy Scout, you have broken my heart. Are you libertarians so used to me endlessly mocking you that you cannot tell when I switch to mocking my own people?

  3. You should post your sonnet on your office door.

    Ex, I gave her the book. Quit trying to horn in on my glory.

  4. Aunt B, sitting here, watching my kids and dogs frolick in the new snow, and wondering what on Earth has you fascinated by this Libertarianism. Shorter version for you:

    I got mine, fuck y’all.

    They can dress it up all they want, but scratch a libertarian deep enough, (about 1/4 centimeter should suffice) and you will find a angry white guy that hates to part with a dollar. They have been around awhile, and their numbers are such that they will never be a viable Political Party.

  5. Well Mack, we used to be called Liberals before the “Government Is Your Mommy” crowd fucked that appellation up. Scratch one of those losers and you get a whiny little baby demanding entitlements from Uncle Sam’s sugar tit.

    Take some time to learn the difference between the Libertarian Party and libertarians. You might learn something, like the short version of libertarianism is:

    1)Mind your own business.
    2)Keep your hands to yourself.

    Not too hard a concept to grasp, unless you are content with the misguided naivete of Modern Liberalism, State Intrusion into Private Life and Patronizing Smugness Masquerading as Compassion.

  6. mack,

    There’s so many things wrong with that, I don’t have the time to address them. Maybe Kat will jump in. I got things to do.

    I will re-state for the umpteenth time that libertarians are not opposed to charity. We just don’t like being forced by our government, and charity at the point of a gun is not charity, it’s theft.

  7. I love this premise of rugged individualism that says everyone should be self sufficient, I am not responsible for anyone other than myself. When taming the Old West, it probably served us well. This is 2006. There is no more land to conquer. The indians have been rounded up, shoved aside, and fortunately for them allowed to open casinos to help advance their people. So, I’m pretty sure that a new and improved rugged individualism means something at least slightly different. Gone are the days when a guy with a good idea could strike out on his own, and, by out working his competition and providing a better product, build his own little empire. The Ownership class is forever shrinking, and that means that more and more is controlled by fewer and fewer. The American business model seems to want to crush competition. Take a look around at the restaurant business, for example. Record numbers of busy people are eating out, yet there are increasingly fewer independent restaurants. Do you honestly think the others are precluded by govt burueracracy, or suffucating regulation? No, I believe the economy of scale is at play here. Sure, there are the exceptions, but it is dishonest to say that the playing field is anywhere near level. Applied properly, govt can prevent those who have pooled their resources from excluding all others, or, like today, it can assist in that endeavor. I’m happy to admit that we havne’t had a properly applied govt in quite sometime, but, we are only about 250 yrs old, a mere blip on Father Time’s er, radar. I believe we can get it right. I believe that the day will come when the people that serve in Govt will be those with a strong ethical core, and a love of service. I want to get into the whole “Govt tit” red herring in a later post, with Aunt B’s blessing. I’m ranting a bit today….apologies.

  8. I also ask the incredibly lovely and nicely proportioned hostess of this blog for forgiveness if the tone of my first post was, well, ugly. I said what I said because after reading you for awhile, I am more than sure that you aren’t going to have this epiphany where you suddenly smack your forehead and exclaim “NOW I get it.” If you are indulging a friend it’s none of my business, I just cannot get my head around their philosophy, and I lack the writing skills to make my point succintly.

  9. My god, I’ve missed out on all the fun discussion. Where to start?

    Peg, I don’t think there are shit-tons of libertarians in Nashville. I think I just like whip-smart mouthy men and, for whatever reason, they happen to have strange political beliefs.

    Exador and Sarcastro, I’m not converting to libertarianism. Not by a long shot. I’m just having this weird moment where I realize that libertarians have very, very important contributions to make to public discourse and have legitimate criticisms of my world-view.

    I still think y’all are wrong. I just no longer think y’all are evil and crazy gun-wielding tyrants that have tiny hearts made of the blackest coal and dry and shrunken souls.

    Mack, if you want to fight with the libertarians, remember the simple rules–no personal attacks. Ill treatement of my guests will be taken by me as ill treatment of me.

    Otherwise, go ahead. No one’s under any obligation to reply to you. But I should warn you, if Coble decides to rise to your challenge, she fights to win.

  10. Well, it was that whole run-in with all the Whos down in Whoville over Christmas.

    My dog is still pissed about the whole antler thing.

Comments are closed.