I think I’m done arguing about abortion for a little while. And it’s really because I can’t argue about it with people who think it should be illegal and still respect them.
There’s two reasons for this. One is that I don’t understand how anyone can go through childbirth or witness childbirth and not be pro-choice. When you see a woman who wants a baby crying and screaming and bleeding and there’s shit and piss and she’s calling out for her grandma or her god and crying some more and tearing apart and she’s begging for anyone who can to stop the pain and this goes on for hours, sometimes days… when you see that how can you feel okay about compelling women who don’t want babies to go through it?
Do you just block this part out? Do you justify it to yourself in your head by saying that that’s just how it is? Or that it’s not so bad? Or that women are built to handle it? How do you watch a woman giving birth and not see it for the tremendous gift that it is? Who do you think you are to compel someone to give a gift that costs that much?
The other reason is that I’m tired of being polite. I was telling Exador yesterday that I wish there was a way for abortion providers to play hardball like the militant gay-rights folks. We all know that anti-abortionists themselves have abortions and hide behind doctor-patient confidentiality and we let them. They do this right now. They did it when abortions were illegal.
Sure, it’s fine and dandy to force me to carry a pregnancy to term, because I’m just a whore who deserves to be punished. But when it’s your daughter, Deacon, who’s looking at either going to college in August or having a baby in August; or your mistress, Senator, who says “We have to find a way to take care of this or I’m going to tell your wife.”; or your sister who’s been a stay-at-home mom to her three kids who shows up at your door because her husband’s leaving her and the kids out of the blue and she’s never worked outside the home in her whole life and she needs a job now because she’s got mouths to feed, but, oops, she’s pregnant; or your girlfriend who was raped; or your wife and the doctor says “There’s something wrong with the baby and it won’t live outside the womb, but if she carries the pregnancy any farther, delivering it will probably kill her.”; or you…
When it affects you, “make abortions illegal” crowd, then a lot of you have no qualms about availing yourself of them. And if you have enough money, when most women who need them can’t get them, it won’t matter to you if they’re illegal. Do you honestly think there’s a single rich person in South Dakota or anyone in the legislature who’s at all worried that they’re going to make abortions illegal? No, because the laws won’t apply to them. When it comes to abortion, it rarely does. They’ll travel or have “emergency appendectomies” or whatever.
And I’m tired of knowing that and still fighting with you. I know it’s not all of the “abortion should be outlawed” crowd, but it’s enough of you that I’m starting to feel like it’s pointless to continue the debate. No reason I ever give will be good enough to justify why I might have an abortion. And any reason you give for why you or your loved one needed one is supposed to be excused as a tragic necessity.