Men, Think Back to When You Were Young

The Professor sent me this link to the “Men Can Stop Rape” campaign. I couldn’t quite decide what to make of it. I sent it to Brittney, who also couldn’t decide what to make of it.

But it occurs to me that we are not the target for the campaign, so maybe it doesn’t matter if we can make sense of it.

So, here’s what I like about it.

–I like that it’s a campaign directed at men. After all, at the end of the day, women are not raped by some third, evil, easily identifiable gender. We’re stuck in a world where rapists look just like ordinary men, which gives ordinary men some stake in trying to end rape.

–I really like that it’s about reiterating that being strong is not just the ability to force your way on people, but also about keeping the people you love safe.

–I like that there are a lot of different men and they talk about a lot of different situations.

What I don’t like.

–Are these men supposed to be bragging to other men? Maybe, and lord knows I’m not clear how y’all work, but does hearing someone brag make you want to be like him?

–If they’re not supposed to be bragging to other men, I’m not sure I get the point. I mean, are we supposed to be glad that they don’t rape?

I have this theory that there are two broad categories of men who rape women. There are evil fuckers for whom rape really is primarily about terrorizing women, because it makes them feel strong and powerful. And, for men to combat those rapists, I think the best strategy would be to frame rape as an act of cowardice and weakness and evilness and toss those assholes in prison for long, long times.

But the other broad category, I think, is made up of guys for whom rape is about sex coupled with feeling strong and powerful. And I think these guys are primarily immature or inexperienced or, for whatever reason, lack the ability to find willing women to have sex with. Couple that with the belief that part of being a real, strong manly man is having sex as often as they can, and you have a recipe for disaster. These men don’t intend to hurt women–which is why they convince themselves that the women really wanted it–but they also don’t intend to not have sex.

For these guys, maybe redefining manhood would be an effective way to combat rape, because it would uncouple power from being able to force people to do what you want. But I don’t know.

What do you guys think?

Edited to add: Everyone should be so lucky as to have librarians who read their blogs and will dig around for answers to their questions. Check out Rachel’s mad libraring… librari-ing… research skills.

Strip Clubs for Straight Women

I’m not that big into male strippers. I just don’t find all that gyrating and thrusting while wearing g-strings to be that erotic. It can be fun and funny, but when I see men at strip clubs, looking at female strippers, I know I’m not having the same experience when I look at male strippers.

Today, though, on the ride home, as I was attempting to think of things to improve my day, I realized what the ideal strip club for straight women would be.

Imagine this, women.

There are three rows of benches on the stage, perpendicular to the front of the stage. Twelve handsome men in well-cut suits come onto the stage and slowly take off all their clothes. They are not wearing g-strings, but boxer shorts. Anyway, off they come.

And then!

And then, the men slowly put on baseball uniforms. They exit the stage. The next group comes out and changes into hockey uniforms. And so on as we work our way through all the cool uniformed things that men do.

How hot would that be?

I can’t believe that no one has thought of this before.

Good Looking Boys

For some reason, the recalcitrant brother’s camera phone makes everyone look like they’ve been run through some weird Photoshop filter. But at least we get to see some photos of the boys.

So, for those of you who are curious, there’s the recalcitrant brother and my nephews*.

And girls, the recalcitrant brother is kind of single!

*I don’t know if it’s clear, but there are just two nephews. The littlest one is in both photos. And I think that we see evidence that the biggest nephew is a better photographer than his father, but I could be reading too much into things.

Last Chance

There’s still an hour before I have to go back to work. If there’s anyone out there who wants to pay me to blog or to sit around their house sassing their pets or to lay in a hammock on their private beach, you have just 60 minutes to let me know.

Otherwise, I’m rejoining the work-a-day world.