Apr 28

Strawberry Blues

I love strawberries.  I make a mean strawberry shortcake from scratch.  But I also like just popping a big, luscious juicy strawberry in my mouth and slowly sinking my teeth into it so that the sweet juice fills my mouth and runs down my chin and…


Yes, I love strawberries.


Right now, on the table, there is a vanilla cake with strawberry filling.  I want a piece of this cake more than I want Bill O’Reilly to suck my butt.


Alas, the older I get, the more allergic to strawberries I grow.  So, for you jackasses, I’m going without.  You don’t say it, but I know you’d miss me if my throat swelled shut and I died.


I hope you appreciate the sacrifices I make for you.

6 thoughts on “Strawberry Blues”

  1. Have you tried blackberries, hon? They are debauchery personified, under the right circumstances. Plus, the picking of said berries is a FINE time, as long as you got plenty of chigger repellent. Lord. Talking about debauchery makes me recall that blue-eyed construction fella over at the offices I visited yesterday. Lucinda Williams wrote "entirely way too fine" about that man.I’ll have to fan myself a while.

  2. Oh B, that really blows. My two year old hates strawberries, he didn’t always. I blame myself. We went strawberry picking, last year and he bit a green one. It also turns out he was coming down with a nasty virus, it just wasn’t his day and he hasn’t touched a strawberry since.

  5. I really don’t want Bill O’ Reilly’s lips near my butt, personally. However, I wouldn’t mind if he was struck mute. Maybe he’s allergic to strawberries as well, could we feed him one. Not as a gesture of love, but for the throat constricting thing?If blackberries don’t work, how do you feel about raspberries?Throwing out the options this fine morning.

  6. I do love blackberries and raspberries. I love all kinds of berries. I just love strawberries the best and am sad that they are off my menu.

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