All evening long, I’ve been trying to write an email to my favorite married man. A totally inappropriate email about his scruffy whiskers and where on my body they might scratch that I would find pleasant.
I couldn’t ever finish it.
I adore my favorite married man. I think he adores me. And I adore that kind just straight forward “Well, I like the hell out of you” and “shoot, I like the hell out of you, too” thing. I’m not very good at it, but I like it.
I don’t know what happened. I used to be able to think of all kinds of deliciously naughty things we should do and had no problem expressing that.
But the way he talks about his wife lately just… I don’t know. It does something to my heart, how much he just unabashedly loves her. That kind of makes me love her, too. And that makes it impossible for me to hit ‘send’ instead of ‘cancel.’
I have another friend. I keep starting emails to him, because I’m worried about him. Sadly, our friendship is not as uncomplicated as my friendship with my favorite married guy and so I think I’ve decided it’s not my place to butt in.
I keep starting this post, reading back, and erasing what I’ve written. I’ve gotten this far, I can’t figure out what else I want to say.