Y’all. I’m sorry. I’ve just been snickering to myself all morning about the Libertarian Scale of Things to Panic About and I shouldn’t poke fun because I love the libertarians and do not want to alienate them and Mrs. Coble is not yet feeling well enough to be back making impassioned reasonable defenses of libertarianism which leaves it to Exador and Sarcastro which can only mean that no matter how the discussion starts off, it’s going to end up with guys who uses words like “bourgeois” and “intelligentsia” sticking up for dumb rubes everywhere, which also makes me snicker every time I think about it.
But I do think it would be useful to actually articulate the Libertarian Scale of Things to Panic About. I was thinking that it was a scale of 1 to 100, and everything is ranked that way. So, 100 would obviously be “They’re going to take our guns away!” and down about 75 would be “Communists have infiltrated the anti-War movement” and down at 2 or 3 is “Back in the past, Commies also were mayors of some cities.”
However, I couldn’t come up with just 100 things that libertarians might panic about, so now I think that the Libertarian Scale of Things to Panic About must be like the Fujita Scale of measuring tornados, with the panic increasing exponentially based on factors beyond my understanding.
So, “They’re taking our guns away!” would be an X5 on the Libertarian Scale of Things to Panic About, with libertarians running to their gun cabinets to make sure all of their guns are still accounted for, running out to buy more guns, and posting on the internet about how they will shoot anyone who dares to take their guns away.
X4 is the presence of living “communists” of all sorts doing anything that might be perceived as vaguely communist and other similar threats, such as illegal immigration.
X3 is big government spending under a Democratic administration.
X2 is big government spending under a Republican administration.
X1 is any perceived threat to their dogs.
Now that we have a basic guideline for the Libertarian Scale of Things to Panic About, I’m hoping that it will make discussions between our beloved libertarians and the rest of the world easier.