There’s nothing to be done about it. One of my friends quit her job yesterday in one of those fiery flameout screaming yelling crying scenarios you think must not actually happen in real life.
It’s been hard for her to find a wide circle of friends here in Nashville, so she’s moving back home. And I can see why. If the social life isn’t going to pan out and the job isn’t going to pan out, at least not any time in the near future, why not go someplace where it seems more likely that it will?
Just how hard is something supposed to be, you know?
I guess that’s something each person has to work out for herself–what she can put up with and what’s too much.
I have a hard time working that out.
And I read Mack’s post this morning, about racism and Imus and it really upset me and pissed me off. I about want to go around punching random assholes at gas stations.
It bothers me that Mack, a dude I care a great deal about, has to go through this shit, but damn, I keep thinking about his kids, who I adore. What if that were The Girl, with her big dark eyes and her long brown hair, standing in line waiting to get some gum? Or The Boy, doing his goofy dinosaur impression?
When’s it going to happen to them? That I about can’t stand.
I can remember being pulled aside as a small child by a parishioner at my dad’s church who had a million questions about why my cousin M. was so “dark.” I’ll never forget that accusatory look on her face, and the anger.
It scared the shit out of me, like we’d inadvertently done something wrong, just by bringing M. to that place. I think I got that the wrong thing we’d done was to bring M. some place where she wasn’t welcome, but I’m not sure.
I don’t know. I guess my point is that kids ought to be able to count on adults to protect them. And even if adults have some stupid shit between them, we shouldn’t take it out on kids.
And yet, not all adults buy into the whole “protect kids from harm” thing and, instead, feel free to make kids the target of their idiocy. And since we were taught to respect adults, we just assume the adult has some valid point we can’t yet see.
That’s not really profound. But it pisses me off.
And bums me out.
Which brings us full circle.
So, at least there is order in the universe, even if the order of things is crappy.
Edited to add: I guess this illustrates the main reason I don’t believe in raising your kids to be “color-blind.” My cousin M. is clearly not “white” looking, even though she considers herself to be a white person, ethnically. It was never an issue in our family and it never came up.
Did that spare her from being the brunt of folks’ bigotry? No.
Upon reflection, I’m going to guess that my aunt’s family is Native American and I will remember to ask my dad.