1. Are you related to us?
2. Have you ever lived more than an hour away from your parents?
3. Do you have a job procured by one or more of your parents?
4. Are you living in a house your parents helped you buy?
5. Do you have to take a shower in the dark because, for some reason, the Butcher doesn’t throw out dead lightbulbs, but instead puts them in with the live ones?
If you answered yes to one and no to two through four, you may talk smack about them, a little. If you answered question 5 in the affirmative, you may talk all the smack you want. Pull up a chair. Shoot, sit on the toilet and talk smack while I’m in the shower. I could use the company, since it’s so dark in there.
But, if you are living in the same town as your parents in a job they helped you get in a house they helped you buy, don’t call me up talking about what a shame it is that the Butcher doesn’t have any more ambition than he does.
Or we will fight, believe me.