You know, a girl might feel bad about discovering that conservative Southern men are running around tut-tutting her unbecoming behavior, but thanks to reading Feral Mom’s post today, I am reminded that I am just embracing my Midwestern Heritage and anybody who would criticise my cultural expression just clearly isn’t keyed in to the ways of my people.
Note how even our young are hilarious… er, I mean, are distasteful vulgarians who should not be emulated.
Me: What are you cooking, M.?
M: [Stirring a plastic pear in a toy fry pan): A penis.
Me: A…penis? You can’t cook penises! I think that’s fruit you’re cooking.
M: It’s a delicious fruit penis, Mama.
C: [Not to be outdone] I’m baking some boobies in my oven, Mama.
Believe me, the first chance I get to work “It’s a delicious fruit penis” into conversation, I’m taking it!