Every once in a while you read a comment about how men have to have sex or they will die, die, die and, if we don’t let them fuck us whenever they want, regardless of our desire for them, it serves us right if they kill us and you think, “Wow, damn, is it really such a hard concept to get that my body doesn’t belong to you, that you can’t just open it up and crawl into it whenever you want?
I, too, have wanted to have sex with someone so much it felt like I would die if I didn’t get to. I may have, in fact, in a moment of weakness, begged someone or another to have sex with me or I would die. I’ve been turned down (I know! Who would turn me down? Have you seen my tits?) and did not, in fact, actually die.
Nor, I must say, did I feel like shooting the folks who turned me down.
I for sure never thought “You have a penis and I need a penis and, if you don’t let me use yours, I will beat you down.” And I honestly don’t get that mindset when it comes to some men and their desire for my sex organs.
It seems weird to me that people would think “I have a right to your body when I want.” You’d think that such a thought popping into their head would be embarrassing, like the way you might momentarily picture yourself running over the person in the crosswalk in front of you. That it would take you aback and make you wonder if you’re being possessed by something evil.
And you’d like to comfort yourself with the thought that such attitudes are anomalies, held by folks who don’t have a lot of power and who don’t set policy. Certainly, there’s no one with any real power over me who believes that my body is available for the taking and that I don’t really have the right to say what happens to it.
“Rape, ladies and gentlemen, is not today what rape was. Rape, when I was learning these things, was the violation of a chaste woman, against her will, by some party not her spouse. Today it’s simply, ‘Let’s don’t go forward with this act.’ ”–Democratic State Senator Henry
I’d love to see the surrounding context for that quote, because, like Rachel, I think it sounds as if he’s saying that, back in the good ole days, you could do what you wanted to any woman who wasn’t a virgin or married.
Just to be on the safe side, I will for sure be wrapping myself in barbed wire, so that folks are clear about not trespassing.