Bad Night’s Sleep

Oh, y’all, I slept so poorly last night I can’t even tell you.  I’ve been waking up every day for the past week at exactly four in the morning and today was no exception.  Except worse, because, as I said, I had been sleeping like shit.

And why, you may ask?  Because even though I have been sunburnt since Sunday, last night was the night that my whole face just hurt to be touched, by anything–pillow, sheet, imaginary 4 a.m. bogeyman.

I tried to get sympathy from the Butcher, but he was all “I found a tick on my balls.” and if there’s one thing I’ve learned from being his sister for almost three decades, it’s that any blood-sucking, disease-carrying animal near or on his junk, trumps any discomfort I might be having.

If he has an encounter with a candiru, I’ll never get any sympathy from him about anything, ever.