And that word would be “rape.”
Just so we’re clear: when you hold someone down and force a broomstick inside of them against their will, you are raping them. If you open a door into a room and see a group of boys holding someone down and looking like they’re on the verge of sticking a broom inside of someone you don’t tell them to break it up and assume everything is okay. What you are witnessing is attempted rape.
See, I bring this up because I see over on Yahoo this headline–“Horrific football hazing case shakes NM town” and I read the description of this case, which involves football players holding down other football players and shoving broomsticks up their butts while the coaches acted as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening (and perhaps nothing out of the ordinary was happening, if you’d like a sickening thought for the afternoon. Maybe this is what boys on the team had done to them and that’s why they’re turning around and doing it to others. I don’t know.) and I keep waiting for the term “rape” or “attempted rape” to come up.
Yeah, sure we get into some sexual assault stuff there towards the end.
But the reason I bring this up is that it occurs to me upon reading this article that the coaches literally did not understand what they were seeing or hearing about.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not at all letting them off the hook. I’m just saying that that’s fucked up, so fucked up you have to say it “fu-u-ucked up.”
You’d think “Don’t put things inside other people without their permission” would be an easy concept for folks to understand, but there’s always some bullshit–“But what if she’s wearing a really short skirt? Then can I put something inside her even if she doesn’t want me to?” “But what if he wants to join the football team? Is it okay then?”
Seriously, no. Just don’t put things inside other people if they don’t want you to.
It’s just not that difficult.
I suspect that this kind of sexual assault is far more common than I’m aware of and I suspect that part of the problem of even beginning to address it is that so many people refuse to recognize it for what it is. I mean, look at this article, calling it “hazing” or “bullying.” No, it’s raping. You have a bunch of rapists on your football team. And a bunch of coaches who don’t think that’s such a big deal.
And let’s be frank about why that is: Because it’s happening to boys.
And that’s unacceptable.