–I am tired of being sick. When I finally unsicken up, I’m laminating myself to prevent the incursion of any other crap.
–Is even floating the idea of having a great big show wedding for your kid so that your boss can score some political points really that cool? I don’t know. I don’t like it, though.
–So what if grizzly bears and polar bears regularly interbreed? Scientists, sometimes I have a hard time understanding why you’re excited about things. Will this make a monster bear that can take over the world or what?
–I hired folks to come in and clean the house. they’re on their way there now. As is the Butcher. I hope he’ll help them with the trash, because I never did make it off my couch yesterday once I got back inside.
–Last night I had a dream that the Hall of Fame was buckling to criticism that they don’t have enough women in the Hall so they found this woman from the hills of Kentucky and claimed that she was some great missing link to the history of Country music, lost to history, but crucial to its development. But everyone in town thought her induction was a total sham and bullshit and so I was roped into doing the ceremony, being the one who had to introduce this woman and make the case for why she was going in.
So I’m up there doing my best and I make up some stuff about her and she comes up, whispers in my ear that she’s got to go to the bathroom, exits stage right, and leaves me up there to keep the crowd occupied. I’m leading them on our second round of “Mama Tried” when the folks at the Foundation tell me that she’s skipped out. “Nerves.”
Whew, I woke up in a complete panic.