Who’s Going to Take You to the Doctor?

We had lunch with the other Reverend.  It was so good to see him and his wife.  I get a kick out of seeing my mom and dad let down their guard and be silly and naughty and just themselves.

The recalcitrant brother and the nephew left right before they got here.

My mom and I had a long talk because her doctor told her that she absolutely cannot be driving, except to work and back and even that, he’d rather she didn’t.  And I reiterated my position that they should stay in Illinois for as long as they can, enjoy being so close to my grandma and my Aunt B. and her family and within easy driving of my Uncle B. and the folks in MIchigan, and then, at some point that only they can say, when they’re old enough to want to be close to their kids, but young enough that they can get used to living a new place, they need to NOT MOVE TO GEORGIA, but think about moving here.

I told Mom to consider how the recalcitrant brother cares for the people who are dependent on him and to ask herself and Dad whether they want to be dependent on him watching out for their well-being.

Things with both nephews are so bad I don’t know how to tell you about them–in one case because, if what’s threatened is accomplished, I want it to seem unpremeditated, so that the kid can have some kind of life later and in the other case, it’s hard to know how serious it is–no one has heard from my sister-in-law and nephew in weeks.

It’s disconcerting.

To hear this stuff and to sit there feeling like “We must act.  What can we do?” only to look over at the person who you’d expect to be feeling this the most deeply, to be the most troubled by the state of things, and to see him…

I don’t know.

I about can’t stand it.

The important thing is that I’ve been as clear as I can that, if they want someone to take care of them, they need to move themselves near to the people who can take care of them, and not the people who can’t.

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