Mrs. Wigglebottom is an Old Fart

Yes, I said it.  My dog is an old fart.  She’s having trouble seeing in dim light (thought we’re all supposed to pretend like we don’t notice) and she barks at every little noise like “Get off my lawn, you rotten kids.”

Which, you know, would be fine.  I’m all for barking dogs as a warning to whatever bad guys that any malfiecence will be met with immediate throat-ripping-out.  But no, she just barks and then looks at me like “You’d better go check that out, hairless ape.”

I’m all “With an attitude like that, you’ll never make the cover of Sports Illustrated.”  But she doesn’t care.

Some of Plimco’s Photos of Our Afternoon

I’ll say this, it’s a good friend who somehow manages to take a bunch of pictures of you, none of which show your double chin.

Repeated for Emphasis–The TVA is Lying to Us

Via the indispensable S-town Mike:

Today’s front page KNS report says the EPA has found “very high” levels of arsenic in water samples, along with other heavy metals, one week after TVA said the water samples were fine*.It says residents should avoid contact with the fly ash sludge materials and gives instructions on what to do if they get contaminated, one week after TVA said the fly ash contained no hazardous materials.

It says area residents who get water from springs or wells should not use the water, one week after other officials told them to just boil their water.

(*TVA still says on their website as of this moment that testing of stream water is within acceptable limits, and they do not mention well or spring water testing.)

I was going to highlight the important parts, but it’s all important.  Basically, everything the TVA said is bullshit.  The water is not safe.  The fly ash contains stuff you should not even touch let alone drink and boiling your water does nothing to remove the impurities.  And it’s covering everything over there.

Edited to add: Also, do not miss Southern Beale.

Edited again to add: I hope you’re not counting on me for accuracy.  The above quote is actually S-Town Mike quoting the genius R. Neal.

Vows of Chastity Easily Broken

It’s been all over the media today that kids who take pledges to abstain from sex until they’re married don’t actually abstain from sex until they’re married.  They just have more unsafe sex than their more realistic friends.

To which I say, ha ha ha ha ha and duh.

I suspect, though, anyway, that abstainance pledges aren’t really “for” keeping kids from premarital sex.  I mean, it’s got to be clear to anyone who’s every lived through being a teenager that promising you aren’t going to have sex, even if you really, really want to keep that promise, is not going to prevent you from having sex.  So, if it’s obvious that making kids promise to not have sex is not going to keep them from having sex, then why, my friends, do we keep making kids promise that they’re not going to have sex?

I think it’s because it’s a way to indoctrinate kids into believing that what they do with their own bodies is up for public scrutiny and to reenforce the idea that it’s okay for other people to tell you what you can and can’t do with your body and that, if you fail to do with your body what they’ve proscribed for you, you are a collosal fuck up and deserve public sanction.

And that, my friends, is bullshit.

On that ‘Fiscal Stability’…

Roger says:

the lack of a state income tax is indeed a major reason for Tennessee’s relative economic strength. By the way, why is it that some of the most highly taxed states in the nation are the ones with their hands out? Check the lineup: New York, New Jersey, California…I don’t get it. They have “progressive” tax systems with income taxes. Everybody’s paying their “fair share.” Everything should be hunky-dory. What could possibly be the problem? More to the point, why is it supposedly somehow our (“our”= people who do live in those states) problem?

And I have just two points.

1.  You’re lucky Rachel isn’t here, buddy, or I’d totally have her tracking down those studies that show that places like New York put more into the federal coffers than they take out, unlike us.

2.  Relativel economic strength?  Ha, ha, ha.  Check this out.  When you’re trying to build a hill “Our hole is smaller than yours” is kind of beside the point.

Like a Kid at Christmas

The Butcher took his Christmas money and bought everyone late Christmas presents.  He bought me Civilization IV.  I’m not going to mention by name the person who stayed up all night playing it, but it wasn’t me.