I Go Back and Forth

–This poor rosemary plant seems to be struggling.  I don’t know if I was maybe underwatering it, but now I’ve soaked it and I’ll see if that helps.

–I’m struggling to finish the Kool-aid afghan but this part is so boring and enough of it is put together that I can kind of use it, so isn’t that good enough?  I say yes.

–We have this cousin–he’s the grandson of my grandpa’s sister–who always sits with us at weddings and funerals (and I guess his parents probably sit with mine, now that I think about it).  But he’s always been a weddings and funerals relative.  Until the internet!  I’m enjoying the shit out of being able to have his funny comments at all times, not just large family gatherings.  How could we stand moving away from each other before the internet?

–I also have to move some pine needles around, on the recomendation of nm, so it would be nice if it stopped raining.

–Oh, but you know, at the boat show, we saw this tiny raft thing that looked like it was literally three inches thick!  If it keeps raining, I can purchase one of those and use it to float around my yard, gardening the high spots!  (Also, the Queen promised us a solar powered canoe, but we never did find it.  They did, however, have a canoe with room for your fishing gear and your hunting gear and computers to aid in all that stuff.  The moment you put a computer on your canoe, you’re saying “No, the dog cannot come.”)

–I’m also still thinking about the “Protecting you from lying bitches” legislation and whether it would hold up in court.  Are there any other invasive non-medical procedures the State can force upon children?  I can’t think of any.  I also think it’s funny (and suspicious from a money angle) that the people most likely to participate are the people who are most assured that the kid is biologically theirs.

It’s going to be a lot easier to get Mr. John Smith to give his DNA and for Mrs. John Smith (who is, remember, at that moment the only legal guardian of the kid) to agree to give Johnny Jr.’s DNA than it is to ever get a man who doesn’t want to be a father to give his or to get a woman who doesn’t want that man to know to give the kid’s.

And that brings up two interrelated legal issues.  One, can the state really compel you go give your DNA on the off-chance some baby born somewhere might be yours?  It’s one thing if your name is the name on the birth certificate; then it seems like there might be cases when it is a compelling reason.  But legally, before you name goes on that birth certificate, you’re nothing to that kid.  In what case does the mere existance of one person negate another person’s right to be protected from unreasonable searches?  The other is, what if you already know you’re not the kid’s father.  Say your girlfriend was raped and is pregnant.  You want to marry her and put your name on the birth certificate and raise the kid as your own.  You and your girlfriend don’t want the kid to ever know that he’s the biological product of a rape; you love the girl and you love the baby and for you, that’s good enough.  You couldn’t do it under Hardaway’s bill.  You cannot decide to be the father of a kid who’s not biologically yours without formally adopting it.  So, is the mother going to have to go back to her rapist and get her rapist to agree to give up parental rights?!

I mean, I’ve got to say, I think the amount of men who are knowingly fathering kids who aren’t “theirs” are a lot higher than the men who are being fooled.  Should there be legislation that would protect you from being defrauded?  I think so, yes.  But this?  This is not it.

4 thoughts on “I Go Back and Forth

  1. Rosemary doesn’t need a lot of water. It does like the sun. In Southern California homes have entire hedges made out of rosemary. Want!!!!! Don’t think that kind of rosemary could withstand the winters here.

  2. Well, then it could just be floundering because it was a 50-cent rosemary I bought at Home Depot, but I was really hoping to keep it alive until I could move it outside in the spring. I don’t know. I was only watering it a little and it was going brown on me. So, I’m trying this to see what happens.

    A rosemary hedge would be awesome.

  3. On the “protecting you from lying bitches” thing – when my son was born in Washington state 33 years ago, the only name they put on his birth certificate was mine because his father wasn’t there to agree to it. Which was fine with me, I didn’t want that SOB to have anything to do with my son, he was a lying, thieving, drug-addicted asshole (which I found out after I got pregnant, he was good at hiding what he was, and I was young and naive). That was a state law at the time. But then the state turned around and wanted to know who he was so they could collect child support from him. So, since I didn’t want him in my life or my son’s life, ever, for any reason, I lied. I told them I didn’t have a clue who my son’s dad was, that I’d been with 3 or 4 guys and didn’t know last names on any of them or social security numbers or family members or anything else that could be used to trace them. What did I care if the state of WA thought I was a horrible person, as long as I didn’t have to deal with an asshole anymore (I was glad when he walked out on me when he found out I was pregnant, since I was getting ready to leave him).
    There are reasons it’s none of the government’s business who fathered a child, and that’s one of them. I also would not want my son’s DNA in a database, because those are not secure and you have no guarantees on how that information is going to be used (and most of the ways the government would use it are not good for the person involved).

  4. I got a cutting of rosemary from a friend last summer and popped it into he ground – it seems to be doing well out there, despite the bitter cold. If your rosemary dies, I can probably hook you up with some. My friend has a rosemary plant in the flowerbed and it just gets bigger and bigger every year – maybe the sun is the trick?

    On another note, I’ve been on a purging spree around here and found a knit piece of plastic bag – it’s a fairly substantial piece – 7″ wide by 12″ long – and you could use it to incorporate into one of your knit bags. Do you want it? I hate to throw it away…

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