Seriously, people, I am swear, I’m about five seconds from going into the psychic political blogger business. There isn’t such a business yet, as far as I know… Oh, no, wait! I am predicting with my psychic powers that psychic political blogging will be a real thing and that I will be the perfect pick for it.
Remember just last week when I blogged about this hare-brained scheme Maddox and Overby had to reward their cronies with university presidencies?
And remember how some people were all like “Oh, no, I’m sure this is just about widening the pool to get the best potential candidates”?
Well, well, well, let us turn to the story in Inside HigherEd.
(People, I must warn you right now, before I even block this quote that, if you have drinks, you need to set them down and finish swallowing before reading what follows.)
Maddox said he was introducing the bill on behalf of “a friend,” but he would not name the individual. He did, however, note that the individual who brought him the bill was not currently occupying any of the specific positions noted in the bill, was not from the governor’s office, and had no direct interest in any of the chancellorships or presidencies in the state.
“For a friend??!!!” FOR A FRIEND??!!! BWAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. Like you buy condoms for a “friend” when you’re 16 or Preparation H for a “friend” now?! For a friend?! Oh Jesus. Seriously, “a friend.” Well, in Tennessee politics as in life, “a friend” means two things: the person you’re fucking or yourself and I think we all know Maddox isn’t fucking around. Is Maddox’s “friend” hoping for a career path that leads him to a cabinet level staff position and then, maybe, oh, I don’t know, to chancellor of UT Martin?
A friend. Ha.
Over at Post Politics, the commenters are speculating that maybe this is supposed to open up the door for John Morgan. I would hope not. Not because Morgan wouldn’t be a decent choice, but because I can’t believe the people who surround him are such idiots that they’d think this legislation is necessary. First, there’s no advanced degree requirement from the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools. They say that, in order to be accredited by them, “The institution has qualified administrative and academic officers with the experience, competence, and capacity to lead the institution.” And the State code seems to give very wide latitude to the governing boards to hire who they want.
Morgan’s public service may indeed prove he has the experience, competence, and capacity to lead an institution, but there’s no point in making a law that demands a university treat ten years of government service to be the equivalent of a PhD. And I would hope that any potential college president (or his supporters) would have taken the five minutes I took to easily discover that, instead of wasting taxpayers’ time and money on this bill.
I mean, gentlemen, please. If you want to prove you’re qualified to run a major research institution, maybe show you can, oh, you know, do a little research.
Ooo, and there’s one more funny: “both of the bill’s sponsors said they had yet to hear any criticism about it.” Really, Maddox? Because my psychic powers tell me that you read my post last week and were complaining about it and I was, indeed, critical of this hilarious piece of nepotism. But, hey, if you want to pretend like you didn’t read my generous invitation for you and Overby to come over and befriend the Butcher in order to maybe set him up with a job he’s not really qualified for, that’s cool.