Let Me Tell You a Story

Okay, I wrote this story and I was trying to decide if it worked, so I thought I’d read it out loud, but that wasn’t exactly working. So, I recorded it to listen to it. And I think it’s just right. I was worried the ending sucked, but hearing it, I think it’s just right.

I took video, because I don’t have a set-up to just take audio, but there’s nothing to see, but about six and a half minutes of my boobs. And not in a fun way. So, it’s better, I think, if you just shut your eyes and let me read to you.

It’s called “Bone.”

One Last Thing on Hardaway

He says, “The second part of that is that it’s none of your business.”

He’ll stick his nose into the business of every couple with children in the State of Tennessee, but some things are not our business? Hardaway, you’re just one of us. No one died and left you king. If you don’t want legislators poking around in your personal life, maybe you should take a lesson from that.

Metro Water: Hell Yeah!

Okay, I called them yesterday at, what, 3:30? Who was in my yard this morning at 8:30?

Metro Motherfucking Water.

I about wanted to hug them, but… well… you know, they were down in the sewer system.

Anyway, they didn’t find any leaks, so I’m back to TDOT to report that.

And I am very happy with my prompt customer service.

The Gun Shoot

A bunch of legislators took the afternoon off to go shoot guns down in Tullahoma. I have some thoughts.

1. You couldn’t have scheduled this for a day when committees aren’t meeting and bills aren’t being advanced?

2. Equality day on the Hill was so scary and you guys are such delicate flowers that you had to have an excuse to get out of town?

I mean, I’m sorry, but, when you’re a liberal, you have to hear, from the time you’re little, how being a liberal basically makes you a pussy, with all that entails. But this bunch has to sneak away to keep from having to talk to gay people? And we’re the wimps?

3. Shouldn’t these people have brimmed hats on?

4. How soon can we see which ones of these fuckers dare request their per diem for this nonsense?

Go shoot guns on your own time. If you’re supposed to be conducting the State’s business, go conduct the State’s business. Everybody who’s campaigning against these bozos should get their hands on this footage and shoot a commercial where challenger is standing there with a huge gun, proper safety equipment in plain sight.

Challenger says something like, “I like to work hard and play hard. But believe me, when you expect me to be in Nashville trying to fix this state, you won’t find footage of me on the news playing hooky down in Tullahoma. I’ll be on the Hill when I’m supposed to be [shows clip of this nonsense] unlike my opponant.” and then challenger puts on the safety equipment and fires off many shots. Fade to black.