A Sign My Mom is Ready to Retire

I called my dad just now to see what he wanted last night, when I was busy watching True Blood and seeing who was going to shit themselves first, me or the dog (aren’t you glad you come here at lunchtime? God.). Anyway, so I call my dad back and he does not answer. I roll to voicemail.

It’s my mom’s voice, saying in the most disgusted, jealous tone–“Hello, you’ve reached the voicemail of [my dad]. He can’t come to the phone right now because he’s busy doing absolutely nothing.”

Bwah ha ha ha ha.

I swear, as my mom gets older, she’s getting this snarky streak that kind of tickles me.

5 thoughts on “A Sign My Mom is Ready to Retire

  1. Oh believe me, a dog can shit itself. We had Zeke on a rand of food that did not agree with him for awhile (til we figured out it was the food that was causing the problem). We had to clean him up manually just about every time he went during that time period. Not fun.

  2. I’d always assume that Tara would shit herself first. And for the record I think there’s a big difference between having diarrhea and “shitting yourself.” I think you have to wear pants to “shit yourself.” So unless your dog is wearing pants, no dice.

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