Yet Another Open Letter to Ron Ramsey

Dear Ron,

By now, I can call you “Ron,” right? I mean, in my head, when I see your name, I make little “pew, pew” noises, but “Dear Pew, Pew” doesn’t really have the tone I’d like to set. I’m writing today to note that you now seem to be saying that you are ready to defy the will of the governor and the State House.

So, I’m writing to ask–You do know you didn’t win the Republican nomination for governor, right? Remember last year, when you were busy acting like a lunatic? That was while you were losing the Republican nomination. You were running around acting like the kind of guy who would make guns with his fingers and go “Pew, Pew” at people, calling major religions “cults,” seeming barely coherent at debates? Remember the debates?

It’s pretty much how you spent last year–not being elected governor–so I’m baffled that you seem to believe that you’ve been elected to the highest office in the state. But, and this is important, I also find it hilarious.

Carry on.

Love,

B.