I think “Back-Up Eating” is an Underrepresented Skill in Popular Music

So, this dude is coming to town, I venture, since I just read about him in every boring media outlet in town. But I watched the video because I was promised Ludacris and I find Ludacris to be amusing in the way my friends and family are amusing–at any moment some deft joking might happen.There’s going to be some turn of phrase or some “Yeah, I said it”ness that will make me smile. It’s like, if I’m ever lonely for my brothers and cousins and their friends, I just watch Ludacris and there I go.

But I think you should watch the video, because I think this has to got to be a first. In this video, Ludacris appears to be back-up eating. Now, sure, you’ve seen some back up singing, and you’ve seen dancers moving around behind singers. You’ve seen bands. You’ve seen marching bands. But someone apparently having a meal? I posit that you have not. Which is not to say that there’s not eating in videos. But it’s more like background eating. Someone is not wiggling himself in front of the camera, in support of the artist at the forefront that moment, mid-meal.

Until now.

Also, towards the end, there is a lovely pit bull. So, stay tuned for that.

But, just in general, this has got to be the most food-filled video I’ve seen in a long time. And I’m not just saying that because it’s lunch.

Aborted Walk

The dog and I got no farther than the AT&T building before we became convinced that the weird noise that sounded like a monstrously large cat stroking gravel was probably thunder. And so we came back, even though it isn’t raining.

I did see that we have beans, which I will need to get out and pick tonight. I did eat one and it tasted green–sharp and fresh.

My family is coming today. I’m preemptively bummed and overwhelmed. It’d better go better than last time or I’m just going to find a dark corner near the bathroom where I can shoot heroin the whole time they’re here. Heroin is the one where you just can’t give a shit, right?

My drug knowledge is embarrassingly limited.