1. It’s funny that Ramsey is such a Perry supporter, because this is literally how I imagined Ramsey in every gubernatorial debate–pew pew!
2. I guess I always assumed there was an 11 and a 12 that moved up into the top ten as guys were removed from the list. Are we really short two people bad enough to go on there now? Also, at first, my brain couldn’t figure out how Joe Saenz was standing, so for a brief moment, I thought he had a cat body. Which would be scary.
3. I thought Jack White’s half-made-up Hank Williams song was pretty good. It does sound like a Hank Williams song.
4. Speaking of the Williams boys, Hank Jr. now claims he was misunderstood. Honestly, he should have just said he was drunk. Because I think we all understood him just fine. Sadly, I think this means we can never hope that Bocephus will fix all the white people he’s ruined. It’s clearly now on Toby Keith to sweep up behind Junior.
5. Sure, one might argue that last month’s issue of Apex Magazine was the best one ever, but honestly, this month’s issue is so, so very good. I would like more poems about mermaids that eat people. I would also like to get in a room with all of the poets I think could write convincingly about mermaids that eat people, but I need to get some chain mail first, just in case… Also, there is a cute snail on the cover, which is awesome.