I hope, with all my heart, that this is like the tales of the rainbow parties where kids give blowjobs in such a way as to leave rings of different kinds of lipstick on a dude’s penis (which, really, should have been a tip that this was not really happening since “I am going to briefly place my lips on your penis in order to leave this gob of colored wax” has got to be one of the least satisfying blowjobs in the history of blowjobs, second only to “I’ll get very near it, okay?” Hard to see how that would actually catch on.) and it ends up just being mostly made up and then blown out of proportion by the media.
Because, if not, holy shit, the anti-vaccination crowd has just gone from “people I think are misguided and risking their children’s health” past “people I think are misguided and risking their children’s health and the health of children who can’t be vaccinated” straight into “Holy fuck, are you stupid or evil or both?!”
Sending contagions through the mail?! Okay, no harm no foul if the virus is dead before it gets to your kid. Except, what about the mail carrier who handles your envelope? What if she’s just come back from maternity leave? Or if your mail ends up at the wrong house? Or rubberbanded in a bundle next to your neighbor’s mail? What the fuck kind of selfish asshole risks the health of everybody between her and the mom who’s sending the virus because she doesn’t trust the government?! How does that not make you some kind of bush-league terrorist? “I send contagion through the mail because I hate the government.” That’s their reasoning.
And let us pause to think about the level of complete and utter idiocy passed off under the guise of “doing what’s best for my children” of putting something in your kid’s mouth you know is going to make them sick that you don’t actually know the sender of. I mean, just dwell on every step of stupidity–you take candy from a stranger and give it to your kid. You give your kid something you know will make him or her sick, but you don’t actually know if the thing you’ve given your kid is the thing you think you’ve given your kid. What if you think you’re giving your kid a chicken-pox laden lollipop and it’s arsenic? If you’re procuring contagions over the internet, you don’t even know that you know the truth about the person who’s sending you shit–whether the person you’re corresponding with is actually who she says she is, whether she actually has a sick kid, whether that sick kid has actually licked said lollipop. All you know about them is that they’re willing to break federal laws.
And you trust them over doctors with your kid’s well being?
And this is supposed to be safer and more natural than the chicken pox vaccine?!
These parents are very, very lucky no one’s ended up dead, yet.