Have We Been Wrong about the Nathan Bedford Forrest Statue?

Up until this morning, I assumed that butt-ugly fiberglass looking thing on the side of I-65 south of town was supposed to be a tribute to Forrest. But then I saw that someone has submitted a close-up of the statue to the Scene‘s photo contest.

America, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?! I’m going to have nightmares. His teeth look like someone’s wearing dentures on top of dentures. His bejeweled eyes seem poised to shoot lasers at you in two different directions. He seems to be stabbing himself in the neck with his beard! People, he’s cutting his own head off with his own damn beard! Did you even know beards could be weaponized?!

If that’s the kind of monster that was coming up the Franklin Pike towards Nashville, who could have even half a second’s regret that the Union fired on it?! God damn, why didn’t the Confederates?

I bet, when that thing was erected, Nathan Bedford Forrest died again of embarrassment. Holy shit.

6 thoughts on “Have We Been Wrong about the Nathan Bedford Forrest Statue?

  1. The colors are real. From the interstate, he appears to be made of fiberglass. I’ve got to assume the eyes are real, too, but the owner of the statue has made it nearly impossible to get close enough to see it and certainly at 70 miles an hour, you can’t see his eyes.

    I’m as curious about how the photographer got this shot as I am about why Forresst has sparkly eyes. It seems like you’d be at a different angle if you were just on the shoulder of the road. But my god, what kind of lens would you have to have to shoot from… um… maybe the parking lot of the Brentwood Hills Church of Christ?

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