Gardening, Even Though I’m Not Gardening This Year

First, I promised strawberries to Lesley and they’re all gone. Just gone. Some fucking fucker animal is happy to apparently eat unripened berries. I need to remember to tell her that my promise has been made a lie by, I presume, squirrels.

Second, I think the grackles have nested in the purple martin house. When I was gardening, I heard quite a ruckus. The kids stay quiet until someone comes home with food and then it’s all “Oh, I’m starving half to death, feed me!”

Third, the mockingbirds continue to be either pissed or neighborly, I can’t really tell. They squawked at me when I came out.

Fourth, okay, so in the sunny end of the big bed, I put lupine, poppies, and some pink daisies of some sort. I would just like to say “fuck poppies.” Well, not poppies themselves. But seriously. You pay two bucks for seeds and there’s like twenty four tiny seeds in the envelope and they mostly stick to the envelope so you can’t really get them where you want. At this point, I’m just hoping to get a few up and maybe they’ll spread? Plus, motherfucking Lowe’s didn’t have red poppies.

Over on the dark side, I put in some lily-of-the-vallies, which were on-sale. I am literally the worst lily-of-the-valley grower, but my god, this would be a perfect spot for them.

There’s so much weeding to do, but I am slow at it this year.


4 thoughts on “Gardening, Even Though I’m Not Gardening This Year

  1. NOOOOO!!!

    I jinxed them. All food grown for me is taken by squirrels. If Santitas didn’t come in a squirrel-proof bag, I’d starve to death.

    I will still come by soon with roots for you. When will you have back yard beer again?

  2. I don’t know, but we can make arrangements for this weekend or for sometime after work, my stopping by would be easier. I’m sorry. Every year until this year, the squirrels have only eaten them when they were really overripe, so I thought there’s be plenty of time for you to come get some while they were at the stage people like them.

  3. It’s robins that eat our strawberries. We were gonna put a net over them this year, but never actually did.

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