I lost my awesome gynecologist to teaching and so have had to go to her old partner. I was nervous, which meant I was babbling, so I ended up explaining to her my fear of having some fetal twin issue–like a nipple on the bottom of my foot or an eyeball in my brain (thank you, Stephen King). And this is how I knew I was going to be fine with her as a gynecologist: she was like “Oh, I know. Some things, you just hear about and you become convinced you’re going to have it. It just gets stuck in your brain. I’ll have to go home and check myself for a fetal twin foot nipple tonight. It’s not rational, but you can’t help it.”
And then she said “Oh, but don’t worry. If you had some fetal twin issues, they would have manifested by now.”
You can age out of fetal twin issues? Fuck yeah. That makes me feel better about my birthday.
Fetal Twin Foot Nipple Ripple is my favorite Ben and Jerry’s flavor of all time.