My dad, as you know, is/was a Methodist minster (Did I tell you guys he’s taking a part-time church? I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, clearly, someone in that house needs something to do. On the other hand, I wonder if we can just set aside this bullshit “we’re moving to Georgia plan” instead of having to pretend like it’s still real. On the third hand, I hope he’s not going back to work because they need the money. But on the fourth hand, clearly, someone in that house needs something to do.) and so we all have accounts at the United Methodist Ministries Credit Union in Illinois.
We’ve had those accounts since we were little. So, back then, I mean, when I was a minor, I probably saved like $350 in there. And then I got a couple of car loans through them and a personal loan to go to publishing school and I paid them all off years and years ago. That $350 bucks has just sat in there collecting interest or dividends or both or whatever.
Today I got a letter from the Credit Union saying that, since I hadn’t had any activity on my account in five years, the state of Illinois believes it has the legal right to take my money. So, I need to deposit something, withdraw something, or close the account. I haven’t decided which of the three I will do, but what the fuck? The credit union knows me. They clearly know how to reach me. Hell, they probably have my dad on speed dial, all the shit my brothers have pulled with them over the years. I’ve not disappeared.
But if I leave my money just sitting in an account accumulating interest and nothing else, the state of Illinois thinks that they get it? I can’t be a shitty, but frugal, saver without Illinois deciding to confiscate my money?