1. My parents are much easier to get along with and get along with each other better when one of them is working, even a little bit.
2. I am probably never going to get used to the feeling of having, one the one hand, people say “Holy cow, that was great” and on the other hand, editors saying, “thanks but no thanks.” If you’re just starting out writing, I’ll say this. It gets easier. But it still sucks. I think it’s okay to get mad and hurt and want to stomp around and throw things, for a little bit. And then you really do have to suck it up and realize that it isn’t personal. May not even be a reflection on the quality of the work. But I’m saying that as someone who’s still like “Noooo! Come the fuck on!” and then wants to cry. I guess just realize that’s your problem, not the editors’.
3. My nephew shot a deer this morning. Looks like a pretty clean kill. So… I guess he won’t be needing deer sausage for Christmas…
4. I’m glad the Butcher is home. He’s been raving all about the trip, but the stories of paths up canyon walls with only chains to hang on? Ugh, I want to throw up.
5. I guess I completely made up the chicken bratwurst at The Pharmacy. Does not exist in real life. And yet, it should.
Re: #2: Yes. I am exactly alligator-skinned enough, and probably arrogant enough, to know my work is not the problem. It’s a matter of taste, saleability, all that subjective stuff I just can’t control.
I find that I can take a short story rejection much better than a novel rejection from an agent, esp. if there’s a sample involved. I am not attached to query letters. Meh. Whatever. But when there’s actual story they’re kicking back? Ouch. Why that hurts worse, from a novel, than from shorts, I don’t know. The shorts are harder and take longer for me to write (seriously), but they don’t feel like parts of my heart.
I find the whole thing terrible, but getting easier to take–kind of.
I think the thing that’s hardest for me is that I’m the type of person who really likes to know what you’re “supposed” to do and then I will either do that to the best of my ability or reject it. And then if I fail, I know it’s because I either just wasn’t good enough or I didn’t play the game. Both things I can live with.
As far as I can tell with publishing, there is nothing you’re “supposed to” do. Like you can’t be the best submitter ever, and thus guarantee all your stuff will be published. That’s really hard for me to make my peace with.