I do think most of this is hormonal and will clear up Sunday, but I’m also just going to say that, in my adult life, Christmas has become a really difficult holiday for me. It makes me acutely aware of the people who are gone, the things we don’t do together anymore, the distances between us. I miss my family like crazy and I regret so much that living here and choosing this life–while it’s been so amazing–means that I’m not closer to my cousins, some of whom have become adults without me really knowing them.
It is what it is, but it still sucks.