My Preferences

My preference is that this be some kind of severe infection along the lines of the last one, which yes, may lead us down a strange path of “Why does Betsy get weird lymph node infections?” But at least it’s something that resolves itself.

But I have to say that, I kind of thing that my second preference is that this is what it looks like, a very small, well-defined, easily removable cancer. Because that would be terrifying and awful, but it would also be a clear path with a resolution.

I think it being something that is not yet cancerous but could be, meaning that I have to just sit here and worry, and go through this again and again, knowing that it could, at any time become cancerous and we have to catch it? That would be very, very difficult.

3 thoughts on “My Preferences

  1. (ahem) Some people just have the possibly-precancerous-whatever taken out, if it’s a small-possibly-precancerous-whatever, to avoid both fretting and frequent future biopsies. Can they do this with lymph nodes?

    Mostly, I’m with you in hoping it’s just an infection.

  2. Hello, B. About ten years ago I had a scan done of my upper body, and a tiny nodule (about the diameter of a nickel) of something or other was found in my left lung. I was eventually referred to the cancer center at my affiliated hospital, and they began to monitor it. After about six years or so, the latest doctor on my case recommended going and taking the thing out. The plan was to put me under and take out the nodule to test it while I was still under. If it was cancerous, then about 20% of the lung (plus adjacent lymph nodes) would be removed. If not, sew me up and send me home. It turned out to be cancerous, so I was in the hospital for a couple of extra days of recovery; this mostly involved draining the wound while it began to heal and the swelling subsided. I was given really great painkillers and anti-inflammatories, and I was back to work in less than two months. (It would have been much sooner if my employers weren’t such sticklers about breathing capacity.)

    I’m telling you this story not because I think your case is closely related to mine, but because I want to encourage you to approach your situation with your usual humor and perspective. A “very small, well-defined, easily removable cancer” is not a good thing, but it’s much better than some alternatives. Just get the damned thing cut out and analyzed, and I think you’ll feel better just knowing. My fingers are crossed for you.

  3. Thanks, guys. I really feel a lot better just having a plan and being on the verge of executing it. The waiting around part is really, really hard.

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