I took a very brief shower yesterday. It was a mistake. So, I am never taking off this bra again. Seriously, I’m just going to live in it. I should have showered in it. Or had someone stand in the shower with me and just hold that boob all Janet Jackson style.

I feel like I’m off the pain scale in some way. Like I’m not in much actual pain, but the discomfort and the swelling are breaking my heart. I just want to feel like myself. Though definitely, showering with that boob having to even briefly support its own weight was like a 4 or 5 on the pain scale, which was alarming considering I’d been having almost no pain since the surgery.

So, in general, the painkillers keep the pain at a 0 or a 1, but on the just feeling weird and uncomfortable and not like myself scale, I’m sitting at a 5 all day.

But my house is crammed full of food. The Professor sent us a big box of ridiculousness that even included chocolate cakes and a note that made both me and my mom cry. And then C. showed up with a lasagna his wife made that was so huge that he wouldn’t let me lift it because he was fairly certain that the dish was over my weight limit. We ate it for dinner and it was ridiculously awesome.

I just feel bad for my parents because I need a lot of minor help–I have trouble getting up from places and the pain killers make me wobbly when I’m up and I can’t really hold coherent conversations and they’ve already mowed and mopped and trimmed trees. I’m sure it’s got to be boring as fuck for them.

But I’m glad they’re here.

3 thoughts on “Unwise

  1. I suspect your disorientation is related both to the anesthesia and the pain meds, good lady. Folks need varying amounts of time to flush the anesthetic out of their systems, but the doctors’ orders to drink extra water and practice deep breathing of fresh air are very helpful in accomplishing that. I found after my surgery that the deep breathing also helps you to regain and maintain a little more coherence — when you’re not napping, which is another great thing to be doing. Your body’s been healing from the biopsy and now this surgery, plus the associated mental stress, so it’ll tell you clearly what it needs.

    Please don’t worry that you’re “boring” anyone, either, miss. You’ve just had surgery. They love you. They’re also grown and can go run around in circles in the yard with the dog if they get restless. ;)

    We’re so glad this worrisome part is over for you and you’re getting a small opportunity to let so many show you how much you are loved and needed. May you rest peacefully, heal thoroughly, and return to your usual state of you-ness soonest, dear one.

  2. You’ll feel a lot better in a few more days. The first few days are generally the worst. Taper off the pain meds as you are able (but take them if you need them, please) and you will become more coherent. Keep hydrated and rest a lot. Perhaps a bikini top would be more comfortable than a bra?

  3. And your pooping problem will resolve itself as the pain killers get out of your system. When I was in the nursing home they kept giving me laxatives along with my pain pills. I finally put a stop to that since that particular problem has never been a problem for me.

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