I have two pet peeves lately that are pretty much ruining my enjoyment of the world.

  1. I hate the reportification of the world. You do anything and some email comes along asking you to write up a report about it. Tell people what you thought of your oil change. Tell people what you thought of that book you just bought. Did the packaging the birthday gift you gave your brother live up to your expectations? We noticed you took a particularly deep breath when you entered the park. Did the smell meet with your approval? Most of the time, I’m just trying to get some shit out of the way so that I can do some other shit I care about. Like, if I have coffee with a friend, I’m mostly concerned about the with a friend part. As long as your coffee doesn’t suck, I genuinely don’t care. I have no opinion about whether it’s better or worse than anywhere else and I’m really fucking starting to resent the implication that I’m supposed to be running around in a constant state of hyperawareness about my interactions with your fucking brands so that I can give you feedback. No, I fucking hate it. Not only don’t I want to write a review, I don’t want your brand fucking nagging me about it. Vomit.
  2. I also hate how much of my ordinary life is devoted to dealing with your fucking ads. Wake up, clear ten emails out of my inbox that are just fucking ads. Same at lunch. Same all the fucking time. I have a few lively email correspondences. But my bullshit to actually useful ads run ten to one. And it pisses me off. Why do I have to hear from Target or Walgreens once a day? I already go there. I hate that the world is just one big goading to get me to buy shit.
  3. I especially hate all this because, to me, it feels like it means the economy isn’t actually very stable. I hate Walmart. I will always choose Target over Walmart, if I can. Target knows, based on my credit card use, that I shop there. That they need me to shop there more and to convert others into Target shoppers? It feels desperate. Same with Walgreens. Don’t even get me started on these loyalty cards. Once you need your customers to market your product for you, I think you don’t know what you’re doing.