Babies Galore

My sister-in-law liked her afghan! Everyone gasped, too, which made me so happy. And she had a fancy dress made that she wore, along with flowers, so she looked like a princess.

My niece continues to be a goddamn hilarious delight. We were trying to remain calm at dinner and so I put my hands together and “ohm”ed for her. She was very confused. “Why are you calling Jesus? Why does Jesus need to calm down?”

Y’all, I know it’s obvious. I know there’s even a song “Jesus is on the Main Line,” but it had never occurred to me that prayer is a phone call to Jesus.

Also, my nephew’s wife is pregnant. My sister-in-law called to tell me because she didn’t want me to be surprised at the shower. It’s kind of a clusterfuck, but also not my problem, so I get to just be happy about it.

But they just found out and they’re six months along. It’s a boy.

So, between bouts of teasing my brother about being a grandpa, I was trying to explain to my niece that she’ll be that baby’s aunt. But she doesn’t want to be a boy aunt! She’s going to be the baby’s nephew.

And my nephew, who is awesome, told her that she can be whatever she wants to be.

Also, my mom told me she’s kind of tired of hats. I don’t know if I will recognize her without an oddly decorated hat.