Continued Flowers

Half the rows are complete! I either need 18 or 28 hexagons to finish. I think 28, because I don’t want to have the top be a long row and the bottom be a short row. I think I want two long rows.

God, I love this so much.

I sent an email to S. last night telling her that, if she doesn’t hear from me that I have a therapist’s appointment scheduled by the time I get back from Phoenix I need her to force me to do it.

Things at work are really great. My job is kind of morphing into my dream job. I still cried last night for reasons I can’t really articulate.

I’m so angry. And I’m kind of angry that this is my life. Like, I feel this kind of outrage that my coworkers are lovely and I like the shit out of them. I’m super pissed that I’m supposed to now go do this stuff I love to do.

It makes me feel insane. Things I know, objectively, I should be excited about and delighted by instead make me feel mad and over-burdened.

Which, truly, is why I need to be back in therapy.

I mean, y’all, I sent S. an email asking her to help me get this done. She sent me back an email saying “Yes, I will do this for you. Here’s my plan for how to get it done” and my very first thought was “Hey, back off. You don’t tell me what to do.” I didn’t write that to her, because I caught that it was a nuts response. But now I’m snapping at help I asked for?

WTF?

One thought on “Continued Flowers

  1. I’m loving this afghan so much! And brains are weird. But at least you’re working on making the toxic weird go away.

Comments are closed.